A New Year's Eve Survival Guide for Introverts and Highly Sensitive People

dress: c/o Unique Vintage

Let's face it: being an introvert and a highly sensitive person (HSP) isn't always easy.

If you identify with being a highly sensitive person or being introverted, you'll know that certain social situations can sometimes feel overwhelming. We can handle them if we've learned how to adapt (thanks to our more extroverted friends and available introvert and highly sensitive person coping strategies). But whether we actually want to partake in them is often a different story.

For a long time, I thought it meant I was abnormal when I felt drained after attending a social gathering or dreaded the thought of going to a party or crowded bar. But I eventually learned that the "introvert hangover" is incredibly common – and that there are highly sensitive person coping strategies that could also help me understand my needs a bit better. 

This is especially important during this time of year, as HSPs, introverts and holidays may not always mix well. Introverts and HSPs alike may feel like they're being pushed past their limits when they don't have enough downtime and feel pressured to be "on" for too long. My holiday celebrations tend to be pretty low-key, but in retrospect, I wish that I would have had an introvert's guide to the holidays to consult in the past! 

My New Year's Eve festivities are also pretty quiet these days. I was never big on going out, but I'm now even more inclined to stay in on the last night of the year. Not every HSP or introvert feels the same way, however. No matter what your plans are, you deserve to celebrate in a way that helps you feel your best. If you're looking for a more subdued NYE – even if you don't have a lot of HSP or introvert traits – read on.

In the interest of HSP and introvert holiday survival, I've put together a little guide for a better New Year's Eve. Here are just a few tips I'd recommend that introverts and HSPs (or literally anyone!) keep in mind as they plan for how they'll ring in 2022.

Keep It Small and Short

Speaking from experience, the perfect HSP or introvert New Years Eve celebration is one that doesn't last all night. A lot of us tend to lose steam after a few hours, especially during large gatherings that require us to socialize with a lot of people. Instead of sending out an invitation that specifies "5 PM – ?," plan to attend for only a few hours at most. This might mean getting home before midnight – and that may actually be a good thing.

It's not just the length of time that matters; it's also about who's in attendance. Personally, I tend to fare better in a small group of people I already know. If you identify with being a highly sensitive person or introvert, try to keep your guest list on the smaller side. With a smaller group, you'll probably feel more at-ease and won't have to spend your energy reserves meeting a bunch of unfamiliar folks. 

At a time when COVID-19 cases are on the rise, even among the vaccinated, this can give you the perfect excuse to host or attend the perfect introvert New Years Eve. A virtual New Years Eve party will provide you with a little bit of social interaction without ever having to leave your house! And since most people won't want to spend several hours on a Zoom call, you won't have to deal with an introvert hangover on January 1st. 

Plan to Stay In

Maybe this goes without saying, but any introvert or highly sensitive person survival guide will probably include an option for staying home during the holidays. This doesn't mean you shouldn't challenge yourself to go out and socialize (during non-pandemic times, at least). But it does mean you'll want to figure out how you like to celebrate and honor that when making plans.

Whether you have a virtual New Years Eve on a video chat with friends or you decide to enjoy a night in with your BFF or partner, staying home can be the best way to celebrate this occasion. You can dress up or down, you'll have access to your own kitchen and bathroom, and you can turn in whenever you please. 

Having access to these kinds of creature comforts can take the pressure off and allow you to make your own traditions. You don't have to ring in the new year at a bar or in a crowded apartment. Instead, you can play board games, watch a movie marathon, order takeout, or pamper yourself – whatever your heart desires. I'd be willing to bet that you'll go to bed (and wake up) a whole lot happier if you plan to spend at least a portion of the evening decompressing at home.

Get Enough Sleep

HSPs, in particular, tend to feel the negative effects of inadequate sleep. I know that I'm more likely to develop a migraine if I haven't had enough shut-eye. And since no one wants to start the new year off with a headache, I'd prioritize your sleep leading up to your celebrations.

The holidays can often wreak havoc on your sleep schedule. If you know you tend to get grouchy or feel ill when you're sleep-deprived, don't sacrifice your forty winks for the promise of merriment. Being a highly sensitive person sometimes means prioritizing your body's needs. Sometimes, that means cutting things short for the sake of a good night's sleep.

Try to stick to a bedtime routine during the holidays or even take a nap before your New Year's Eve plans. And don't attempt to offset your sleepiness with coffee or soda! HSPs can also be more sensitive to caffeine, which means you may not be able to rely on the methods that others do to feel more awake. The best thing you can do is honor your regular schedule as best you can.

Eat and Hydrate Properly

If you're anything like me, you become hangry to the nth degree if you aren't careful. HSPs often feel the effects of hunger or low blood sugar more than other people, which means you really shouldn't go for too long without eating.

When planning for your New Year's Eve festivities, take breaks to have meals and snacks. Be sure to nosh on some protein! Trying to do too much on an empty stomach may make you feel overwhelmed or lightheaded, which definitely isn't ideal if you're out of the house and in a social situation. 

Take care to hydrate, as well. Whether or not you plan to drink alcohol, you'll feel a lot better if you don't become dehydrated. Stave off a possible headache and feel your best by drinking lots of H2O. 

Take a Time Out

Introverts and HSPs can often become drained or overstimulated in noisy social environments. You don't necessarily need to avoid these situations entirely, as it's often better to learn the introvert and highly sensitive person coping strategies that will allow you to navigate the world as it is. 

Instead, plan to take some breaks during the evening so you can reset. This might include grabbing a buddy to go outside for a bit of fresh air or asking your host if there's a quiet bedroom where you can retreat for five or 10 minutes. If you start to feel like everything's a bit too much, give yourself permission to take a few moments for yourself. Take some relaxing breaths, have some water and a snack, and dim the lights. Small time-outs like these can help you recharge a little bit during a gathering.

Bring or Wear Comfortable Shoes

Whether you're looking for introvert New Years Eve tips or you simply want to have a better time when you're celebrating, I'd recommend thinking ahead to the tired version of yourself. You might feel great in your high-heeled boots when you're heading out, but you're going to be pretty miserable by the end of the night. 

To get more longevity out of your social reserves, you'll want your body to feel its best. That means dressing for comfort. You don't have to opt for ugly footwear, but I guarantee you'll be overjoyed that you brought comfy shoes in your purse to change into later on in the evening. Bring some bandaids, too. You'll thank me later.

Consider Staying Sober

I know this one might be a bit controversial – and this isn't going to apply to every introvert or HSP across the board. As a teetotaler, I'm also biased in this area. But if you've got highly sensitive person traits or you tend to be more introverted, it might be worth examining your relationship with alcohol on New Year's Eve (or during any occasion, for that matter).

Research suggests that some HSPs are more sensitive to the effects of alcohol than the average person. I've definitely found this to be true for myself, which is just one reason why I don't drink. Anecdotally, many HSPs say that they rely on alcohol to temper the overstimulation we sometimes experience; because we're constantly taking in so much of what's around us, booze can sometimes be used to dull that sensation and make things feel a little more manageable.

Understandably, alcohol and other addictive substances can present problems for some HSPs. Introverts may also lean on alcohol to help them come out of their shell. Obviously, this can be problematic in some situations.

If you feel pressured to drink alcohol on holidays to fit in or calm your anxieties, you're not alone. But if you find that drinking has negative effects on your mood or your life, you may want to look for some highly sensitive person coping strategies that don't involve imbibing on NYE. 

Looking for some alternatives to boozy beverages? Check out my New Year's Eve mocktails post from last year for inspiration.

There's nothing inherently wrong with having a glass of champagne or having a couple of drinks on NYE, even if you've got HSP or introvert traits. But if you've partied too hard in the past and you'd like to wake up feeling good, remember that you can still have a great time while sober.

Set Boundaries and Have an Escape Plan

Highly sensitive people are often confused with empaths. It's possible to be both, but these terms are actually mutually exclusive. In turn, empaths can sometimes have poor boundaries with other people. As someone who is highly sensitive and a people pleaser, I'll tell you that I've often sacrificed my own well-being for the sake of others' good time.

Being an introvert and HSP in her thirties, I've now learned that these tendencies can be really damaging for me. It's still not easy for me to set boundaries, but it's become a necessary part of life. Note that setting boundaries doesn't mean trying to dictate others' behavior; it simply outlines what you're willing to accept or tolerate (and what you're not). You don't even have to tell anyone else what your boundaries are. But regardless, you need to be prepared to follow through.

For example, say that you know you don't want to be around other people who are engaging in certain behaviors on New Year's Eve. You can't control the decisions that others make, but you can make your own choice about the kinds of situations you're willing to be in. You might set a boundary that you won't stay at a party where someone's choices make you uncomfortable or you won't ride in a car with someone who's been drinking. You'll have to follow through on this boundary if that does happen – which means having a plan of action. 

In this scenario, you might strike a deal with your friend or partner that you'll leave at a certain time or if you feel the situation is no longer healthy for you. You might also ask a friend to call them to pick you up or download the Uber app and plan to use it if necessary. 

Even if you don't anticipate needing to follow through with a strict boundary during your New Year's Eve celebrations, you may still want to have a "plan of escape" if you simply feel too exhausted or overwhelmed at any point. Again, setting a time limit on the festivities or even establishing a signal with a friend can ensure you have a great time without pushing yourself too hard and regretting it later.

Refer to These Tips For HSP and Introvert Holiday Survival 

Being a highly sensitive person or introvert doesn't mean you're drastically different from other people. It also doesn't mean there's something wrong with you or that you need to "get over" these traits! Introversion and high sensitivity can be incredible assets. But if you get stressed out in highly social situations or you want to avoid feeling drained at the end of the night, these tips can often help. 

Again, this doesn't mean you shouldn't ever push yourself to go out. (Although right now, a virtual New Years Eve party would be a lot safer!) You don't always have to stay in, even if your HSP and introvert traits are strong. But no matter where you celebrate, looking out for your unique physical and emotional needs can be one of the best ways to enjoy yourself. 

If you identify as an HSP or introvert, what are some of your favorite survival tips? Do you feel like this introvert and highly sensitive person survival guide applies to you? Let me know in the comments!

Self-Care Tips For Introverts and Highly Sensitive People

I always intended to give this space a fashion focus, rather than making it a true lifestyle blog. But on occasion, I've talked about my personal struggles. These posts have been scary to publish, but they've also been really cathartic (and have often been well-received). I've written about breakups and heartbreak, as well as identity, self-esteem, and the importance of vulnerability. I've always been careful to not turn this blog into a journal, but I also fear that my posts are sometimes too superficial.

Next month, my blog will turn four years old. I'm proud of that accomplishment, but I sort of feel like I'm not doing enough with it. And while I didn't make this an official resolution, I want to branch out a bit in terms of my content – specifically with interesting or challenging things that aren't necessarily related to personal style but that are very much personal to me.

Pictured: The Highly Sensitive Person ||  Sensitive enamel pin c/o Color Theory
Target candles and bottle brush tree (similar)

...Which brings me to today's post. I've been incredibly stressed out and totally drained lately. Learning how to balance a creative and demanding full-time job, rehearsals and performances, a relationship, blogging, and various other responsibilities has been a real struggle. As an introvert and highly sensitive person, the pressure of these obligations often takes a bigger emotional and physical toll than it might for others. While we tend to thrive in creative, unconventional environments, there are times when the world gets a little too overwhelming for us.

Even though I work pretty well under pressure, I know that I require significant time alone in order to recharge. But when you barely have any downtime, that can be much easier said than done. It's not always realistic to take substantial time off from work, so I have to take advantage of what little free time I have. If you're feeling anxious, stressed out, particularly sensitive, emotional, or just plain burnt out, you might just need a little break from it all. Below are some of my favorite coping mechanisms and self-care methods for my fellow introverts and HSPs – but I think they'll be of benefit to just about anyone.

Spend time in nature

I was in a near-constant state of anxiety this past summer. When I couldn't figure out what else to do with myself, my instincts took me outside. I don't consider myself to be a very outdoorsy person, but whenever I spend time in nature, my mood lifts and my mind feels much more at ease. It's actually been scientifically proven that taking walks in nature can help reduce stress and can even stave off depression. I'll usually head to a local park, but backyards, hiking trails, or other green spaces work well, too. This can also be helpful if you live with other people and don't have a private space in your home.

Get moving

I think most of us know that exercise helps us both physically and mentally/emotionally, but it's easy for me to forget how big an impact it has on my well-being. Any fan of Legally Blonde knows that exercise releases endorphins! Plus, working out can act as a distraction and as a means for reducing frustrations or even solving problems. I've never been a fitness queen by any means, but doing some kind of physical activity on a regular basis allows me to sleep better at night, have more energy during the day, and generally feel happier, more accomplished, and more confident. This year, I want to branch out and try something like Zumba (or maybe tackle yoga again) in addition to walking outside or on the treadmill/elliptical.

Escape to another world

Sometimes you need to check out of your own reality for a little while. One of my favorite ways to do this is by getting sucked into a good book or by watching a comforting TV show or movie. While it's not good to run away from your problems, these activities allow me to relax and shift my focus. When I'm too brain-dead or anxious to be productive, I'll turn on an episode of Friends, watch a Disney movie, or read a bit of this book (a gift from my dear friend and fellow HSP, Rusty). Personally, listening to music when I'm stressed tends to backfire – it's usually a bit too stimulating – but I know that many people find it to be a good option.

Write it down or talk it out

Though I've never tried it, my friend Rusty says that journaling his thoughts has been a very helpful practice for him. If you can put what you're feeling into words, it can allow you to see things more objectively. I think therapy can also be extremely beneficial, and I wish there wasn't such a stigma about seeking it out. There are a couple of friends I'd feel comfortable talking to as well, but I don't always want to talk to someone else about my problems; I tend to want to work them out for myself. Writing down what you're experiencing can help you look at things from a different angle or take out unnecessary emotion from the equation.

Consider your environment

Until recently, I never realized what a huge role my surroundings play in my overall mood. When I was living with my parents, I felt constantly on-edge because I felt like I never had any privacy. I'm so much happier living on my own, surrounded by things that bring me joy. Another thing I've learned: I can be a messy person, but messes tend to make me anxious. One of my main resolutions for 2017 was to stay on top of the housework and generally be more organized. Since I work from home a lot now, I've found that I need to be in an environment that makes me feel calm. I also decorate with touches that make me feel happy whenever I see them. If you live with roommates or a partner, try to find a quiet space that's all yours for when you're feeling overstimulated or overwhelmed for even a few minutes of precious alone time.

Make a plan, list, or schedule

I'm not sure whether this is true for all introverts and HSPs, but I think a lot of us tend to be "type A." Many of us are perfectionists and planners. I tend to get totally overwhelmed if I have a lot of tasks to complete; for a long time, my response was to avoid them altogether because I didn't know how to tackle them without getting stressed. Often, I find that making a list, a schedule, or a plan with specific goals or a timeline can help a lot. I know that I don't do well when I have to wing it. Even if I end up deviating from a schedule, I can have that to work from. Since I essentially make my own work schedule now, it's more important than ever for me to plan out my days. I always make sure to schedule in breaks for when I'm feeling too tired or stressed!

Think about what you put in your body

Admittedly, I am not usually very good at this one. I think it's best to strike a balance between eating thoughtfully and healthfully (i.e., thinking of food as fuel for your body to do its best work) and letting yourself indulge and enjoy. For me, equating food with comfort tends to be a slippery slope because I often turn to junk food when I'm feeling stressed. I have a wicked sweet tooth, and I'm currently struggling to keep it in check. One of my other resolutions for the new year was to be much more mindful of what I'm eating. Weight Watchers has been really helpful for me in that regard because it makes me much more accountable, but food journaling or making a conscious effort to follow certain food standards can help, too.

In addition, HSPs in particular tend to be a lot more sensitive to any substances like caffeine, sugar, or alcohol. Although I drink more caffeine now than I used to, I have to be very careful about how much I have. If I have too much, I'll be anxious and jittery for hours. I can't even take Midol because there's caffeine in it! I never really enjoyed drinking all that much in college and I actually don't drink at all now. It's a personal preference, and if you like a glass of wine at the end of a long day, that's okay too. But if you find your caffeine or alcohol intake is affecting your ability to sleep at night or be productive during the day, you might consider cutting down a bit.

Find comfort in a furry friend

Those of us with canine or feline friends are very lucky in that our pets are natural mood stabilizers. Studies have shown that caring for a dog as an adult can lower stress levels and can reduce depression. It's also been proven that a cat's purr can reduce stress and provide a host of other physical benefits. While they may not always do what we'd like them to do when we're upset or anxious (I'm looking at you, Pumpkin), the act of showing affection to your kitty or pup will likely make you feel much calmer – and your pet will enjoy it, too.

Give yourself permission to unplug

In the digital age, we're constantly connected to our devices and our social networks. There's a lot of pressure to be constantly engaged, and while there are benefits that go along with that, it can be a big source of anxiety. This election season was especially overwhelming. I purposely took a break from Facebook for a weekend afterwards and it helped a lot. Although there are a lot of things to enjoy about these platforms, I make it a point to enjoy my life instead of merely documenting it. I might have less engagement and fewer followers, but I'd so much rather spend time with people I love – or by myself – than feel like my life is ruled by social media. Remember that it is perfectly okay (and advisable, even) to take a break from your personal tech use.

Get pampered

I find that getting a massage or taking a personal day to catch up on rest can be two of the best things I can do for both my body and mind. No matter your preference, self-care methods are extremely important for overall well-being. Taking a long, hot shower or bubble bath can do wonders. Paint your nails, have a blow-out at the salon, take yourself out to lunch, or meet up with a friend for tea. Reward yourself in a way that acknowledges your hard work and invigorates you for what's to come. Put your own comfort ahead of your other obligations for the day (or at least part of the day). 

Go exploring

Whether you want to take a weekend trip out of town or want to spend the afternoon exploring a familiar place, a change of scenery can also change your entire perspective. I know not everyone can take time off from work and family life to take a vacation, but if you're able, you should. Studies have actually shown that just planning your trip will give you a huge happiness boost – oftentimes more so than the vacation itself! That's why it's better to plan a trip well in advance; the anticipation is even more rewarding than the relaxation. Of course, exploring a new place can be exciting and can help you forget your stress. When you return from being away, you can look at your responsibilities with fresh eyes and a renewed spirit.

Acknowledge what you're feeling and tell others what you need

Above all, don't be afraid to ask for help or to tell important people in your life what you need. This can be difficult to communicate when you're overwhelmed, but if you can't express it at the time, reflect on it afterwards. That way, you can tell your friends, family, or significant other how they can help you when you need it. For instance, laughter always helps me a LOT. Whether it's intentional or sheer instinct, my boyfriend knows how to make me laugh when I'm feeling stressed out and it's a huge relief. It helps me breathe and acts as a great reset button.

It's also important to acknowledge how you're feeling, rather than denying or ignoring what you're experiencing. Being honest with yourself and others is how we learn and grow. There's no shame in feeling overwhelmed or being highly sensitive. But acknowledging these things allows us to discover how to deal with issues that inevitably come up. You're likely pretty hard on yourself as it is, so remember to be patient and forgiving for your own sake.

Do you have any favorite coping strategies that I didn't mention? Let me know in the comments! I'm always looking for new ways to wind down and refuel. And if you're wondering whether you might be a Highly Sensitive Person, this HSP test might help you figure it out. Finally, let me know if there's anything you'd like to see or learn more about here this year. I'd love to hear from you!